TAMAR EPISODE (29 & 30)

 TAMAR

Episode 29

The following day we did the same thing, sing and prayed. 

I saw lady Zity and her son, she looks sad, she was talking with Abel by the fountain and I saw Abel holding her hands and saying some encouraging words to her which I couldn’t hear what he was really saying.

Vim was always coming and going, he was always more to himself, sometimes when he sees me, he wants to see who is behind the Khimar, he will look at me interestingly before walking pass.

I felt in my heart that Abel already know who I am, he act so familiar with me, i move around with Tedran who planned returning in few days time for his wedding.

 I was so happy to see the smile on lady Phin’s face as her husband's health improves, he was gradually getting better everyday as he began to do things on his own again. 

After few more days he became more independent, as he began to speak understandable words which he couldn't do before

I was sitting at the fountain alone, while Tedran was inside, Vim suddenly came and sat beside me, he wanted to thank me for helping the father with his health, he looked at me all over again and later said

"why do I feel like I know you… yet I don’t?

My palm began to sweat.

He cleared his voice loudly and continued.

"... Leah, I’m grateful to you and your brother for my father, I must confess that there’s something about you, is as if…I have known you my other life.."

He suddenly began to laugh out loud

"...hahahaha! apologise, but I can’t help laughing at myself…I wish I can have a glimpse of your face, well.. is all good..."

He paused and stared straight ahead at nothing with a serious facial expression.

"...I use to love a Lady, so deeply. Is a very long story which I don’t want to remember or you have probably heard of it because the people never stop talking about it…but I don’t want to remember.."

He paused again and looked around the fountain before he continued.

"..she use to come out here to pray to her god when she was living here, I loved her but she loved her god and chose him over me. the unfortunate thing is that she died for the same god..."

He gasped out sadly

....well that’s being almost three years now or more. I have tried everything possible to put it behind me. thought I will go crazy, I felt like I was going to die when she died, I want to burn down this entire kingdom for her sake. I sustained a deep knife cut, deep one on my back as the soldiers tried to hold me down that dark day that the unfortunate thing happened. After I came home, broken, lonely, sad and in pain, Abel, you know Abel, he did help me, he spoke words to my heart repeatedly, and helped me pull through and I became calm..."

He became quiet and did not speak for sometime but later continued again.

"...i still hätê my sister, I håté her with passion for planning with the merchant wife to do such ev!l, I refuse to listen to her side of the story because what exactly do she have to say that will bring the déãd back to life, I refused listening to anyone who tries to speak to me on what lead to Tamar being taking to Mandioh. I'm not interested in any story that won't bring her back to life. why will my sister plan such evil with Okra, why, when she knows that I love this girl and even though I got angry and said her god can have her after she rejected my proposal is that enough reason for Zity to plan with her evil friend and send Tamar to her early grave? Zity is only lucky because she is my blood, I would have thrown her into the lions den too, i can’t look at my so called sister’s face without seeing the evil she did to me, mother and father pleaded on her behalf but I’m not ready to forgive her, maybe someday I will but not soon. she hurt me so deeply...I still hurt from the lost..."

He turned to look at me, but the good thing is that he can't see my face.

He must be wondering what I look like behind the whole coverings.

 "...So Leah, are you married or you have somebody asking for your hand in marriage?

It was as if he realized himself and said immediately

".. forgive me for the question, I'm sorry for asking. thanks for your time anyway…"

I watch as he stood up and walk to the front before turning to look at me, he went to his chariot and speed out of the gate.

I wondered if he was falling in love with Leah, the new me!

why does he want to know if I was married or not.

 I really needed to speak to Abel. 

 The following day I saw Abel again talking with Zity, Abel seem to be the only one Zity goes to, she was always inside her chamber with her son or outside at the fountain with Abel and I know she must be heart broken knowing that her only brother hates her and also loosing Chakan, her husband to death.

It must have being sad for her.

 I went to sit with them at the fountain one day, Abel stood up as he saw me approach them, he came to me and took my hands into his as he lead me into a chair.

 Zity watch us in silent before greeting me, I replied back warmly and she smiled.

 her little son walked around the fountain playfully, I thought of little Jon and I know very soon Zity will come to a shocking realization of her other surviving son she had for Adolfo. 

I breathed deeply again as I saw Vim walk pass us, he looked at my side and replied to Abel’s greeting, he ignored Zity and walk past.

 I saw sadness written on Zity’s face but she tried to hide it.

 just then I was told by a servant that Lord Reese was calling me, so I stood up and left.

As I silently work along the passage way, I overheard Tedran talking with Vim, so I became very quiet so that I can listen to them

"...sorry for my numerous question but is she married…your sister, Leah? I have never like anyone ever since the lady I was suppose to marry died, but even without seeing her face I do like her. it sound quick but I don’t need forever to like someone. Is about a week that you two came down here to help my father get better, I doubted after several physician came and instead of getting better he got wørst. through you and your sister, my father is well again. I don't know how she did it or the magic that was performed but I'm very grateful to you and your sister. I noticed that she is always quiet and hardly speak, I wanted to engaged her in a conversation the other day but I felt it wasn’t proper and stopped…"

I listened as Vim continued talking with Tedran.

It felt wrong eavesdropping on their conversation when they mean no harm.

I quietly walk past to Lord Reese chamber.

TAMAR

 Episode 30

After a long talk with Lord Reese and lady Phin, they finally understand the ways of God and fully accepted him, I was so happy for them, lord Reese said

"thank you Leah, thank you for taking your time to explain God to us, we have always wanted to know about him but the girl who was suppose to do so died, it was unfortunate and we all felt her absence, she has the kind of aura you have around you, Leah, but I understand now that she is in a better place. Heaven is a place to be after this earth.."

He breathed deeply and continued

"...thank you for filling the gap for Tamar and picking up where she stopped, we are grateful to you and your brother Tedran, and I wish I can see your father, whom you said is called Lord Cozam and also a physician, we will be grateful to him. You came from a family of physicians but you do not depend on drugs but on God, the most powerful physician of all..."

He looked up and it appears his eyes was brightened up by the sun rays penetrating through the window.

"...by tomorrow we will burn all the scared god we kept in this house, we will put everything that is contrary to our new faith aside and embrace Jehovah fully. you said we need to be baptise with water, we are available anytime you are ready to do so or Abel, Abel is also a real servant of God, whatever we need to do just let us know Leah, so that we can do so. you mentioned that all my sin has being washed away, all my ignorance in bowing to different god of this land has being nailed at the cross, that God being so kind and merciful has accepted me just as I am, me and my wife...?

I replied "yes, my Lord"

He continued

 "that means God will never count our sins against us anymore, now I’m a new man in Christ so also is my lovely wife, right?

"Yes my lord" I replied again.

He smiled and continued.

"We are so grateful that it was never late, God indeed gave me a chance to hear this and to accept him before dying, if I have died before you came, I would have ended up in another tormented place, but now I know the truth and I have seen the light, I can die peacefully without fear..."

I stood with a bow, as I thanked them too for opening their heart to embrace the light

I ran out to search for Abel that evening, my heart was filled with joy as I ran along the passage, I suddenly bump into Vim and loose my balance, I was almost getting to the ground when he caught me and gently drew me up.

 I freeze at his touch, he held my hands without saying a word, just looking at my Khimar as if he can see through me, I shake my hand reminding him that he was still holding me, he quickly released me and started apologizing,

“Pardon me Lady Leah, i sincere apologies. you seem so excited…what is the good news..."

"Yes, I'm really excited. your parents have accepted Christ and embraced the light, I feel so happy for them. how about you…what do you believe in, who do you serve…?

I asked and he looked at me with a straight face.

"Well, I don’t really worship any god, except maybe money which answers everything…but if accepting your God as theirs makes my parents happy then is fine. everyone have to find whatever makes them happy, I don’t want to stop them any more like I did before, all I want is for them to be happy…"

"Are you happy…have you found your own happiness, does money really makes you happy? of all the money you have, the properties and power you own in this kingdom…do they make you happy? why don’t you want to experience this unspeakable joy, this undiluted peace that is found in Jesus, my lord...?

He gasped as he kept trying to see through my veil.

"..money does not answer to all things, if it does your father would have being healed long time ago before I came down, if it does the lady you speak of, Tamar, would have accepted your proposal and be married to you long time ago, if money really answers to all things the dead will be alive and no sickness or sadness will be found among the rich. God alone is the answer to everything. Even after you die to the world you will live for him. so what exactly is your fear with the true God, what is keeping you away, tell me please..?

"Your God took the only woman I ever loved so deeply, when I thought he saved her from the den by not allowing the lions to eat her…he still allowed her to die. this lady am talking about is ready to die for this god you talk about, she was a strong Christian, she loved your god yet he allowed her to die. what kind of god does that? she wouldn’t have died if she had married me, if she has listened to me and chose another god for herself. How do you want me to worship this god that watch his own people die, I was here that day, giving her chance and hoping she will change her mind, I was still angry but I couldn’t go back to her after she turned me down, my pride was bruised. It was a servant of Mandioh that came with the news that Mandioh had sent for me, the servant said to me that his Master has a good surprise waiting for me. I never knew It was that béãst of a woman they called Okra, that teamed up with Mandioh and my sister to kill Tamar, when I arrived at the place, Okra was all nice and full with wicked laughter, she tried to give me a cup of a grape wine but I turned it down, I knew she was up to something, she laughed and said I will love the surprise she has for me and I will come to understand that she will not allow any slave to humiliate a strong son of the soil. I did not understand what she meant, even Mandioh and the rest of the people where all laughing, I wondered why there were so much people at Mandioh’s place, it only means one thing, he was feeding a Christian or an infidel to his lions which attract lots of crowd..."

I watched him sigh heavily, it was as I just opened an old wound

He speaks and struggled to control his emotions.

".. I got scared as I wonder who could be in there, as they led me to the opened lion’s den my fear increased, when I looked inside, I saw two ladies, at first I didn’t know that she was the one, but when realization hit me, it was like a thunder strike to my heart. I almost jump into the den but I was held back, I was shouting her name, asking her to pretend to be dead so the lion’s won’t hurt her.."

He chuckled a little before releasing a sarcastic laughter.

"... Dis you know what she did, instead of playing dead like I was instructing her, she spread her hands wide, as if she was asking the lion’s to come and feed on her, my body went cold, I swear and curse, I wanted her out but Mandioh said it was too late and when I looked again, it was really too late because the lion’s were already on her, digging their dirty sharp fangs into her, and with every struck from the wicked béãst on her it was as if they were also stroking me. I became another man as i caught Okra who was running away, I bundled her up and pushed her into the den, Tamar won’t be the only one to d!e, anybody that has a hand in her dèãth must pay with their own life, and Okra was the first then Mandioh follows..."

He took another deep breath as he wiped out perspiration from his forehead.

"... the physicians couldn’t save Tamar even her God disappointed her…I still feel so much anger anytime I remember the whole thing. is sad Leah, very sad. At the end I started blaming myself, and that’s where the guilt still eats deeply at me because I told her to her face and also told my sister that her God can have her, I told my sister that I wash my hands off Tamar, and she took my words to Okra and they held onto my word and eventually k!lled her..."

Another quiet breath followed

"... Leah, I k!lled her with my own word, not Mandioh’s lion but I, I k!lled Tamar with my words, and it…is…."

Vim suddenly stopped speaking as tears glitters in his eyes, he hurriedly walked past me.

 I stood as he walk into his chamber, I breathed deeply before going to search for Abel.

when I did not see Abel, I went to Tedran’s chamber

"I'm going back tomorrow, by next week I and Shamara will be married, I wish you will be there. I don’t think this people will allow you to go, especially lord Vim, he likes you, he actually confessed his feeling for you to me. He was asking me if you are married or engaged to be married, I told him that you are not. He said he wish to see your face, he doesn’t mind the burnt scar on your face which makes you to cover up with the khimar, all that matters is that he just wants to look at your face, he said you remind him of someone. So my dear Tarm…sorry, Leah.."

Tedran haven't fully gotten used to my new identity and name but he's playing along so well.

He cleared his throat and continued

 "..I’m trying to get use to calling you Leah, how long will you keep on with this before you reveal your true self them..?

"As long as it takes, God has to direct me to do so, i asked him to guide me in wisdom and God has really been good to me. the master and mistress finally accepted Christ, i bumped into Vim on the way and he can’t stop talking about my past life, is difficult for him to believe in God…." I replied Tedran.

" Then make him believe. He likes you as Leah and doesn't seem to care about your scâr, even though he still carries the hurting memories of Tamar…"

"Maybe because he haven't really seen the lion's scâr on my face and i can’t still have anything to do with Vim, even if after revealing myself and he still want me, we can't be together. He doesn’t believe yet, i can’t be unequally yoked with him, if it means saying "no" to him again then I will do it all over. He needs to come down from his high horse, God needs to humble him, I can’t do more than my power, he is God’s property and at the right time, God will bring him to himself…"

After speaking with Tedran I later went down to Zity’s room, she smiled as she opened up her chamber and I stepped in, I sat beside her, her son was with Lord Reese and lady Phin, his grandparents in their open chamber.

Zity was alone.

“My lady, I know how difficult life must have being to you, I was told you lost your husband to accident…"

"yeah…I deserve whatever that has befallen me. Leah, I have done so many terrible things, my husband died because of me, he got angry with me for sending my personal maid Tamar and another slave, Shamara a slave girl who had affair with him to the lions, he said why will I do such a wicked thing. If Tamar had listened to me, she will still be alive, I told Tamar to just pick any god of the land so that she can live but she refused. As for shamara, I wanted her to be gone, not like I wanted her killed but she joined Tamar in her faith and they both died. If not that she accepted the same faith with Tamar, she could have sold either as a temple prostitute or into another household. my husband was so angry and rode out with his chariot, he fell off the chariot and broke his neck which lead to his death. I was pregnant for my son, people blame me for his death, my brother blames me for Tamar’s death and has sworn never to forgive me..."

She heaved a heavy sigh.

"... I use to be terrible in the past, my late husband was the second man I was married to, the first was his father and I treated him so bad before leaving him for his son. i even… lose the baby I had for him, the baby died…after birth. if I tell you all the terrible things I have done, you will want me to be stoned to death. Abel has really helped me, since I returned home, I can’t go out into the street without people talking about me, I can’t even talk with my only brother, even my parents blames me for Tamar’s death, nobody want to hear me out, it was only Abel. I feel terrible being in my chamber most part of the day, sometimes, I'm just alone while my son plays with my parents, I’m glad they love him. Abel led me to Christ. I use to think of commiting suic!de, I wanted to k!ll myself back then after everything came crumbling but Abel pulled me out of it, he made me to know God, now I understand why Tamar could not deny God in the presence of her enemies and even as she faces danger. I understand why Tamar was strong willed and refuse to bow to any god. Thank you Leah for bringing my parents to light, Abel is a seer, he ones told me that a lady on a khimar will come and pray for father and he will receive his healing, he said it one of those days at the fountain, when he was teaching me the word of God. And when you came, it was as if his prophecy came to life, he said the lady has an uncommon identity but I will see my past life in her, I did not understand but all that matters is that God used you to heal father and help them to embrace Christ. I’m so grateful for that. my parents coming to know God, I’m ashamed of my past, I feel real terrible when I think of it. Tamar died because of me, I told a person I wasn’t suppose to tell about her faith and she took it upon herself to destroy Tamar, Tamar saved my son, I could have abørtèd him but he is alive today because Tamar talked me out of abortion, which I thought was a way to pay Chakan back for having affair with a slave. She was God sent to me and yet I did not realize that until she was gone, Chakan also died because of me but Abel said that I shouldn’t worry that Chakan is saved, but sometime I can’t help worrying, I wish I have stayed with my first husband who is married to one of his maids now. they are both strong in the Lord, that’s what Abel told me, I feel bad for some bad choices I made, especially I was opened and think the person I truly call friend was really a friend. I don’t blame anybody for whatever I am passing through or I have passed through, I blamed myself. Abel said I should keep praying for Vim, and I have being doing that and hoping someday he will learn to forgive me, I wish I can bring back Tamar to live so that Vim can love me like his little sister, just as the old times, I don’t have any friend…I need a good friend and also a believer, so I plead with you…can you be my friend Leah?

She took a deep breath

"... I know you were involve in a fire accident that left you with a burnt scar on your face which makes you uncomfortable, people may probably judge you because of your appearance, but I don’t really care about that, your look doesn’t count to me, all I need is a hand to hold and somebody ready to listen like you are doing now. I only got one friend Abel who is not always around, he is the only one that did not judge me, every other person was throwing blames on me and I know I deserve it all, so can you be my friend Leah? I want to start making good choice and live with the mind that Christ has paid for all my stupidity at the cross…."

We talked for some time and I assured her that she can find a true friend in me.

 Zity was happy as I left her chamber To meet Abel who just returned.

he began to smile as I came to sit with him.

"All I want to do right now is to draw you close and give you a hug like you deserve. I have missed you, I hope you are not wondering why I am so cordial with you…".

Abel said to me while laughing

I joined in the laughter.

"I did not wonder for long, because I know God must have revealed it all to you. you already know who I am, they said you have the ear of God, Adolfo said so too. I must commend you for all you have being doing in people’s life, everyone speak greatly of you Abel…"

"I thanked the lord, him alone deserve the glory. I do the work of my father in heaven. I am more proud of you Tamar, I know everything, God reveals it to be even before it happened. I told you to watch and pray because trial was coming for you and I weep ahead of time even before it came, God revealed it all. He showed me how you, the physician and his son came to know Christ, God showed me when you embarked on a journey of coming down here, I saw it like a dream when you stopped at the inn with Tedran and passed the night there, I saw you at the place of the woman who has no husband or child of her own but children cloud around her and one of them belongs to Zity..."

I was dumbfounded as I listened to him.

He continued not minding how shocked I was.

 "...i was inside my chamber that day when God ask me to go to the gate that you are here. Welcome home my lady, you fought hard and came out stronger, I have being expecting you for long, I’m glad to see you again, your greater reward is in heaven, for you have fought a good fight of faith, you have finished the race and kept the faith, there is a store for you a crown of righteousness, which the lord the righteous judge will award to you and not only to you but also to all who have long for his appearing..."

I felt a sudden breeze blow cold air around me and follow by warmth.

I looked around to ascertain if we're the only one at the fountain or there were some invincible being that I couldn't see with physical eyes.

Abel continued

"...i feel so proud of you and my joy was so full when I heard you refuse to deny God for the gods of this land or for a glamorous wedding with Vim. You chose God over everything and God will never disappoint you, he will always be there when you call on him. For he said whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my father who is in heaven..."

It was a pleasant evening with Abel, and right there I felt God’s presence around us.

I told Abel about the master and mistress accepting Christ and he said he will baptise them, I asked Abel if he will ever get married and he surprised me with his reply

"Yes, soon enough. God has shown me whom to marry. At first it was funny but who I am I to doubt God’s judgement, I am building her up and making her stronger in the Lord. Her past maybe terrible but God loves her and God is turning her imperfection to his glory, I have not revealed my intentions to her yet but waiting until God gives me a go ahead. everything I do depends on God’s approval. I thought I will never get married but God’s ways are not my way..."

We talked about other things, even talked about Vim, and Abel told me Vim needs to come to Christ and is my job to make sure he does, but I don’t really know how to make Vim understand.

I have been praying for God’s grace, I told Abel by tomorrow I will be visiting the merchant after I bid Tedran goodbye.

Tedran has to go so that he can be married to Shamara.

 We talked into the deep evening and later Zity came out and sat with us while Abel changed the discussion into God’s word before we bid each other good night.

 I still I wonder who Abel was talking about, who is the person God ask him to marry?

 I have asked him who that maybe and he said at the right time I will know that's if I haven’t yet.

could it be Zity?

Abel will be Zity’s third husband if he marries her.

 I thought God will give Abel a woman that is pure, a woman who has never defied herself with the ways of the land. A virgin, a woman who has God fearing just like Abel is.

 I know God’s way are not our way, and his plans are higher than ours. 

I hope I’m not getting ahead of myself, what if is not Zity , but who then will that be? 

Let God’s will alone be done.