Just a little sin episode (53&54)

 JUST A LITTLE SIN

Episode 53

Omie spoke to me extensively after the Bible class, I felt energised in my spirit man and knew that I was indirectly conceding to sin, even without knowing.

To run this spiritual race with a clean slate isn't easy at all, there alot of things that God frowned at and even some of the things we take as normal is on the list

She said I have to resign from the job, she was ready to look for other jobs for me but is going to take a little time.

I agreed at first but really pained that I have to start all over on another job hunt.

I decided to give it a thought first

I visited Lydia to know how she was fairing and I went with lots of goodies for her.

The strange thing is ever since I gave my life to Christ and started on this heavenly race of mine, I no longer have any kind of emotional feelings for any woman

Not for Lydia or Omie

I was really focused and the only challenges I have was madam and whatever her secret plans towards me is.

Whenever I think of Lydia, I always say a prayer or two for her because she played a great role in my life, that I will never forget.

I see her as a sister in the Lord and a God sent in time of need.

I feel very much attached to Omie but not in a wrong way, rather in a good and cordial way

I feel absolutely nothing for Lydia and whatever happens in the past, no longer bothers me

Is a neutral, sisterly relationship that I now operate

She is not into me and already made it clear but she promised to help me in my walk with God.

Which was the exact thing I needed.

Getting to her place, I gave her several things I got for her plus cash, which I packaged in an envelope.

She accepted everything except the cash but I insisted and refused to take it back.

She thanked me greatly for my kind heart.

I stayed a little more, even ate a delicious pancake meal as we talked about how to have an uninterrupted faith in God.

She may not be very good like Omie when it comes to teaching but she is a good prayer warriors and a fantastic adviser, like a hope giver.

I left after I was done with the pancake and malt

She asked me to visit anytime that I'm free and I promised to do so.

As I walked back home, I try having some quiet time with myself and God.

I like looking back and brooding over the past

I have really come a long way, I'm not very easy to be convinced over a thing, I'm a stubborn son of my father, unforgiving, revengeful fellow.

I have done lots of wrong in the past and do not deserve mercy

I'm imperfect, that's true but I try not to center on my imperfections to do wrong.

The good thing about me is that I stand for truth, justice and håte to pretend.

I'm a very straightforward man and I love my mother.

I still remember Duni, who was supposed to be my first love but she threw my love back to my face and said several things, things that hurt me back then.

She even said that I had a bad breath which isn't true and said that I'm not worthy of her.

I'm glad my friend back then confirmed that I was very okay as a man.

Duni's dèãth hurt me deeply and I wanted to revenge on her behalf.

Thinking back, I will say that it was one of the most fool!sh things I ever try to do.

I later ended up with beautiful Oni whom I thought I can finally spend my life with as husband and wife

I know I used a love chärm to get her so that I can hürt Juru, her then boyfriend but it came to backfire on me heavily, thank God for my Mama who with her kind heart saved me from dóom

Oni had wished for death because of the ill treatment from her Dad and step Mom and I rebuked her severally

She wanted to die like her Mom because of the way her father and step Mom treated her.

 After several months of håting her, I fell for her without knowing how.

I was ready to be the father of her baby and be the husband of her youth.

The exchange of bride price was planned and the two families gathered to join us together but war broke out between Oni and her step mother.

That was how I missed getting married that day and looking back now, I can see it was all God's doing which I'm grateful for.

He saved me from Oni, I could have have a late wife and people will refer to me as such if not that the wedding didn't hold due to the fight that broke out the very day.

I have been angry and wanted to reschedule for another wedding day but Oni said she will have to give birth first and I agreed.

Only for her to d!e during the delivery but her baby survived.

Everyone believed I was responsible for her pregnancy but I had no hand in it because I never touched her except for few cuddle which was late in her pregnancy stage.

Indeed, God works in a mysterious ways and I thank him for saving me from what I couldn't save myself from.

I didn't realized that God's hand have been on my life untill now.

Yes, the tormenting dreams that almost drive me insane later stopped but the guilt feeling remains

I have met Konji during my second visit to the city and he offered me a crâzy job of going to Churches, pretending to be under the influence of the holy Spirit and falling under the anointing during prayer so that at the end we will be paid 

I couldn't involved myself with such act and Konji got himself embarrassed during the church drama.

It was then I met a God sent Omie, whom I have mistaken for Oni due to the striking resemblance.

She has been the light on my path ever since

Now, I understand clearly that it was a big sin.

 that Konji's fake performance, which he tagged hustle is a sin and any act against the holy spirit is one of greatest of all sins

I never participated even as an unbeliever, I can tell good from the bad and washed my hands off such thing.

Looking back at my life, I'm grateful to God for his guidance

He cared for me even when I don't know him much.

Now that I have decided to follow him fully, allowing old things to past away, I thought it will be a smooth journey

But the road is truly rough and giving up is far easier than continuing on this rough track

But I'm not going to surrender to ev!l monitoring spirit, who are looking out for my failure in this race.

I won't give them reason to celebrate, no matter how difficult the road maybe, with the help of God, just like Omie had said I will overcome

I prayed quietly as I returned back to the house.

Month will end in nine days, counting from today and I will be able to collect my salary and tender my resignation.

I'm going back to Yoara, to live with him.

Is unfortunate that I still haven't gotten a place of my own.

Is a good thing that he was no longer dating or planning to marry Chumi.

We will just be two brothers and will spend time talking about God together.

We will race on together in God without anything interrupting or any woman distracting our journey of faith.

Yoara will be happy to see that the new me is very serious with the things of God.

I know he will be very happy

Is a good thing I'm no longer in the world.

I called Yoara to ask how he was doing, I wanted to know the situation of things around him first.

He sounded very lively, I asked him what was going on with him, he said nothing serious.

He was just happy.

He then later disclosed to me that Chumi came back begging and confessing to him and he decided to forgive her

They've patched things up and planning their wedding again.

He said whenever the date is set, he will send the invite to me.

After the call ended, I really didn't know what to think.

Going back to Yoara was no longer an option.

I have to look for another option.

Konji was not a better option.

Is not just because he lives in the trenches, but his kind of person can land me into trouble

He had refused to leave gambling and other dirty acts and focus

I don't want to be part of any of his doings.

It seems I will be stuck with madam a little longer

This is one of the most difficult personal race of all time

JUST A LITTLE SIN

Episode 54

"I gave you an idea, I advised you as a friend, one of the biggest advice that will be of benefit to you but you decide to remain adamant, you want to be poor for the rest of your life? 

I continued with my Bible study guide and didn't say a word to him or raise my head to look at him

"... You're no difference from all this new converts, once they are born again, they will start forming holier than thou but just give them few months or wait let small hunger.. strike them then you will see them running back to their old lifestyle. I know everything about this set of people and you're no difference from them. Infact, you're acting exact replica of this set of "born again" that I just described..."

I had words that I wanted to say to him at that moment

Words that just came into my heart as I was studying the bible guide.

I wanted to use the word of God to shut him up but wisdom is profitable to direct.

I felt at that moment that it was unnecessary, I will just be like a sounding cymbal

Like a noise to his hearing.

I kept quiet and decided to close the bible guide that I was studying

I felt really distracted from all the talk.

"...listen, even this heavenly race that you think you're running, if you're too careful you may end up in hell. Is not by over righteousness or perfect lifestyle. The good thing about this whole thing is that you can still fail and at the end God will give you a pass. Didn't they teach you in your church that even if you sin small God will still forgive you later. God forgives little sins because he is a merciful God. So even if at the end you continue to service madam and give her different styles so that the cash gift will be attractive, you're not really sinning, you're hustling and trying to make money through a legit means instead of carrying gùñ to steal and kill..."

If it was before I could have think twice on this his bad teaching but now that I know the right and wrøng and understand clearly that God frowns at every forms of sin.

I shunned such a sátánic advise

God does not dwell in the body or environment filled with sin yet John, who thinks he's a Christian can say all of this trash boldly, knowing well that he was talking nonsénse

This is dëcéiving, a lot of naive Christian who does not know their real stand with God can fall for such fallacy.

"You're a partner with the dev!l, deceivers of men, you're indirectly wining more souls for the devil with such words, I therefore rebuke you, get behind me sátán.."

I finally replied him

He paused for something, looked at me for a while and began to laugh hysterically.

"So, in your mind Tomasi, you think you're more righteous than me, you think God use to take a nap anytime you go into Madam's room and spend an hour or two with her in there, doing what I already know, which isn't new anymore. You think God is napping and won't see or know that you're commiting sin with madam? You feel you're holy by picking up a scriptural book to look into or by babbling on and on in the name of prayer. I only wanted to give you confidence which I already know that you lack. So that you can continue doing your dirty, secret business with God's understanding offcourse, making money while enjoying yourself with madam and since you're a also a newly born again you can also make God understand that none of your deeds with madam is intentional, you only needed to do it because you're a man that need money..."

John has lost it, he was not making any sense

But he feels confidence talking trãsh

His phone began to ring, he picked up right there.

"Yes shinna, I'm busy now and there's nothing on me. I have told you before to stop calling me, I will be the one to call you when I have something for you. Please don't call me again, I don't have money to give you.."

He waited as he listened to the other person on the line.

I guess the person was shouting and threatening before the call later ended

John usually step out most time if he wants to receive a call or make some kind of call

There's still calls he stays in to make and receive

This are the kind of call he will likely step out to receive

He probably felt there's no point stepping out because I don't have any business with his outside runs.

I bent my head and went back reading the Bible guide.

John decided to finally step outside to finish the conversation with the caller.

I have heard that name Shinna before, I can't remember exactly where but it rings a loud bell in my mind.

I tried to go back with my study but my mind kept flashing back to that same name.

I paused and think hard but no idea of where I have heard the name came.

I decided to go and urinate, it was while I was at it I remembered it like a flash

Shinna is one of the names of those guys that attácked me 

Yes, I heard one of them call out to the second one with knife to attãçk me

Two names where mentioned, I remembered only Shinna, I will think of the second name later

The third guy's name wasn't mentioned.

Is from the second name that I will be able to confirm if John had anything to do with this guys

If he had a hand in my attack 

I may not trust John but he can't possibly have a hand in my attack

We're not dragging anything and he was the one I kept updating of my well-being then.

I know he suddenly began to misbehave and I can't tell what went wrøng but he can't possibly want to kill me or associate with those kind of dangerous men 

There's no possiblity in it, I have my doubts but I will think hard for the second name and try to search it through his contacts.

I will know when to sneak out his phone and search for the name without him knowing

Is until then I will know if he is involved or not

After few days, salaries were paid but I got none.

Sometimes the money will be transferred to our accounts, while there are still times that they will present it envelope by envelope.

I have collected my salary in an envelope about three times and the rest of other months were transfered into my account.

This time around it was by envelope and none was given to me.

I checked if mine was paid into my bank account but I saw nothing.

I was still thinking about it, why everyone got their monthly payment except me,

A staff came to inform me that madam wanted to see me.

John began to laugh, he said I must have committed a serious crime that made madam decide to withheld my salary.

He said maybe I didn't service her well, I didn't attend to her personal needs like she usually like 

And the consequences for poor service has come

He was making jest of me and laughing.

I ignored him and went to see madam.

Madam asked me about what we discussed the last time, if I have been able to think it through.

She said that I supposed to have an answer for her by now because she had given me enough time.

I remember the verse in the bible that said if sinner tries to entice you, do not fall because you will be selling off your soul to the enemy and the wicked will gamble with it as they please.

I can't remember the exact verse but I have come across similar quotes, Omie had also given me a Bible verse like that before

John has said that God is very understanding and he will definitely forgive even if is a deliberate sin.

A very dangerous advise that can even lead to dèãth

We humans underestimate God and takes his kindness for granted

John also forget that no matter how you try to cancel a fault it will still come to light one day.

There's punishment, a heap punishment waiting for the offenders of God's law.

Those who knowing and understanding a particular thing is a sin but still went on to do it without remorse.

God håte sin and he has made it very clear in the scriptures and I won't be found as one of those on his blacklist.

My slate will remain without stain, even if I have to fall then it should be what I have no knowledge of, so that when I knells to plead for forgiveness after realizing, my cønsciénce will be without judgement or condemnátion.

"The offer is a big one ma'am, I have think it through and I understand that is a big opportunity for me..."

I watched as she began to nod her head while smiling.

I paused and then continued.

"... but, I'm not interested in the offer ma'am. I appreciate you for picking me among many to serve your personal needs but I don't want to be associated with such a pleasurable job, although I haven't understand fully what the other part of the job is aside serving your personal needs but I'm very okay with my plumbing Job and wish to stick to that if you won't mind..?

She frowned at first before curving her lips into a smile.

"I'm not sure you understand what you will be missing. I have not even explain in detail the other part of the job which even madam gold recommended you. You will enjoy lots of benefits and time will come you will be going for vacation and traveling to different countries of your choice. The good thing is that you're young, agile and good looking too. This qualities are all to your benefits if you accept the job. You don't even need to think about it twice because alot of young men are searching for this kind of opportunity that I'm giving to you in a platter of gold. I will give you another chance to go and think about it again and get back to me.."

I try to protest, I tried to tell her that there was no point going back to think again because my answer will still remain the same but she raised a finger up shutting me down.

She continued by setting up cash on her dressing table.

There's a smaller cash at one side and a bundle of cash in another

She pointed at the smaller one and said

"... that's your monthly salary which amount to nothing. You will spend it off and may not have a left over for major needs and to extend a helping hand to your family, while this other bundles is what you will be getting every month. You will have alot to save even after all your expenses and alot to send to family and friends in financial need, you won't lack anything, you will be living a very comfortable life and with time, a car will be giving to you and a house of your own.... this are parts of the benefits that comes with the package. Poverty and wealth is presented to you, make your choice. I'm sure even God will want you to be comfortable while serving him, choose wisely Tom, rejecting all this good thing will be rejecting everything that comes from me, including your normal salary, the free accomodation giving to you, your feeding and other allowances. You may end up in the street as jobless, homeless and poor. Yes, that's the disadvantage that comes with rejecting my offer. Think well and think hard before making your choice..."

After talking, she said that I can go, I turned and left.

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